


why

by aestate_aertenae



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Gen, I'm Sorry, POV Second Person, So much angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-13
Updated: 2016-03-13
Packaged: 2018-05-26 10:49:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 438
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6235732
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aestate_aertenae/pseuds/aestate_aertenae
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>the first time you lose to them, you don't understand</p>
            </blockquote>





	why

**Author's Note:**

> so this is supposed to be for seijou week day 1: champions but i apparently cant write anything happy w seijou no matter how hard i try so it's sorta not really champion-ish and it's very sad and i'm very sorry.
> 
> i guess it sorta fits v loosely in the sense that they're not champions?? (hahaha i hate myself)

i.

the first time you lose to them, you don’t understand.

you practiced, you practiced so hard, all of you did.

why didn’t you win?

 

ii.

the second time you’re angry.

you tried so hard, harder than you ever have before.

why did they win?

 

iii.

the third time, oh, the third time, you’re furious.

you’re not  sure who to be angry at: the opponent who beat you or the one waiting on the sidelines to take your place, to rise above you and achieve everything you couldn’t.

why did you lose?

 

iv.

the fourth time you lose, you see white.

they’re standing there, smug and self-assured, new teammates surrounding the boy who always beats you, the boy who’s the same age as you are.

you have new teammates too, more experienced teammates who’ve fought on this stage before, who could win with you.

you try not to be petty, try not to think “we could’ve won if i’d been switched in sooner.”

but you’ve never been a graceful loser and you want to yell at everyone cheering on the stands.

why aren’t you good enough?

 

v.

the fifth time you lose, you almost expect it.

it’s not like you were hoping to lose, you’re not the type to fight a losing battle, but you can’t exactly say you’re surprised.

this time you can’t blame anyone but yourself: you played the entire match, your teammates were at their peak.

they were just better.

what makes them better?

 

vi.

the sixth time, you lose.

huh.

you don’t even make it to them this time.

you were so busy staring at them, you forgot that you could lose to others.

you see them celebrating on the other side, almost in shock, like they didn’t expect to win, like they’re amazed at their own abilities.

this time, you hold your head high, you make sure your team is okay because no way in hell are they going to shoulder this on their own.

you know first-hand what that’s like.

so you take them out after, act like everything’s okay, but them all ramen and pretend to be distressed when they order sides and extra and anything they can think of.

when you all part ways, you know what’s going to happen: you’re all going to go home, dodge questions about the game, and head straight to your room.

you walk home with him and consider asking him to come over or asking if you can go to his, just so you won’t be alone.

in the end, you don’t say anything and neither does he.

why didn’t you deserve to win?

**Author's Note:**

> once again i want to apologize and i'll work on my making seijou not suffer game for the rest of the week (no promises though)


End file.
